General Freak-Out

So my life is getting really depressing right now. So I really doubt there's going to be anything good in this entry.

First off, I finally balanced my check book, and I really should have been keeping up with it, because I missed the mark on a check and forgot I had written it, and so I had to use my overdraft protection and got into trouble with that. So I got an NSF/ Overdraft fee which pisses me off, and I'm going totally broke. Once again, I'm at the point where if I don't have a sudden influx of cash by the end of next month, I can't both pay rent and my credit card bills. It's so awful because I already went to my parents once and got a loan and hated myself for it. I wanted to be independent, and I'm crying help already. This will be twice in two months. I know I know, they're my parents, they won't mind, and all that, but I mind. I don't want to ask them for money. I don't want to be doing that all the time. I grew up always asking them for stuff and I want to do it myself now.

The job hunt isn't going particularly well either. I still haven't heard back from anyone at Starbuck's yet, and I'm still waiting on Costco. I had a drug test and they were supposed to do a background check, but I kinda expected to hear back today. The woman at the drug test said something about orientation this week,and if it's this week, I'd kinda like to know more than one day in advance...

I was pretty sick over the weekend. Saturday I just got super-sick to my stomach where the thought of food made me want to throw up. But of course there was nothing in my stomach to come up. So it took until yesterday until I felt like I could really eat anything again, and until this morning until I actually did. I'm not divulging any of the details of my sickness because that's between me, the toilet and a lovely bottle of Peptol Bismol.

I think the worst part of all of this is that I put my parents on a cruise on Sunday. They were here, and now they're gone, and I can't call them where they are now because they're out of the country, and I told them not to use their cell phones unless it's an emergency. I usually talk to my mom on a daily basis. This whole non-communication thing is downright weird. (And scary, especially since I'm watching the season of Buffy where her mom dies. It's totally freaking me out right now.)

Question of the Day: How's you're overall state of mind at the moment?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm proud of you for wanting to be independent and not wanting to ask your parents for help. So many people these days do the exact opposite. It suits you well to stand out in the crowd. Plus, you're intelligent and beautiful. The whole package.

PS Don't you just love Joss Whedon's writing?